


little do you know.

by loveless (zhulixir)



Category: Soloist - Fandom
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-27
Updated: 2017-09-27
Packaged: 2019-01-05 10:53:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 943
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12188604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zhulixir/pseuds/loveless
Summary: Love always finds a way.





	little do you know.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nostrumin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nostrumin/gifts).



_"Little do you know_  
_How I'm breaking while you fall asleep_  
_Little do you know_  
_I'm still haunted by the memories_  
_Little do you know_  
_I'm trying to pick myself up piece by piece"_

 

He tilted his head ever so slightly to look out the window, noticing how the weather mirrored his feelings accurately at that very moment. He held his knees close to his chest as he kept staring at the rain pouring outside. It was around 20°C out but he was wearing very thin clothing, but it didn't matter. He was chilled to the bone yet he waited for the numbness to take over. He never noticed how cold it was without **_him_** near.

 

 _"Little do you know_  
_I need a little more time"_

 

It was a petty fight, really. They were both in their worst temper and unintentionally lashed out at each other. We all have our flaws and being unassertive in our own selves. Luhan, he is the worst out of the two. Myriads of relationships yet still unable to learn from his previous mistakes. Repeatively hurting the ones he loved and denying those feelings emitting from himself. Maybe diagnosed with philophobia, hah, such coward. Continuously blaming others for his blunder and getting away with it. **_He certainly is the worst._**  

It was his fault, being too insecure and anxious ever so even though he was granted the most fulfilling sincerity of a relationship. He was too timid to love him back wholeheartedly due to his own foolish reasons. He understood now how self-centred he was. He still is. He couldn't help going back to square one though he tried his best to move on. Yet here he was again, the same memory etched into his mind, setting itself on loop, like a broken record that could not be replaced.

 

 _"Underneath it all, I'm held captive by the hole inside_  
_I've been holding back for the fear that you might change your mind_  
_I'm ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight"_

 

 ** _'Wu Yifan'_** Those three syllables fell so easily out from his lips as tears begun to form again a the corner of his eyes. His eyebags doubled and his eyelids puffed slightly after countless nights of shedding tears before falling into a light slumber. Truly, it was hard to have beautiful dreams when his mind was a mess. Regrets filled his chest and every day, he swore it was getting harder to breathe.

 

 _"Little do you know_  
_I need a little more time"_

 

Luhan was startled awoke again. He started to reminisce those times they had together and let a soft smile tugged the corner of his lips. He recalled the times they would randomly lace their fingers together. Luhan lifted his arm to hover his hand above his face. He then slowly grasped the air, imagining his lover's fingers intertwined with his. He let out a gentle chuckle and shuts his eyes. How pathetic he was.

He then remembered the ice cream dates they usually have when there was free time. Two vanilla cones and gentle pecks on the lips. The simplicity of such dates wouldn't a thing for others, but it was everything for Luhan. He never asked for more, acknowledging how busy they both are usually. But sometimes, when Yifan planned dates, it is the most memorable ones yet, though he is quite a clumsy man. The thought made Luhan smiled slightly more. _**He missed him so badly.**_

 

 _"I'll wait, I'll wait_  
_I love you like you've never felt the pain_  
_I'll wait_  
_I promise you don't have to be afraid_  
_I'll wait_  
_The love is here and here to stay_  
_So lay your head on me"_

 

Abrupt knocks snapped Luhan from his reverie. He didn't feel like moving. He only turned his head towards the door of his apartment and stared at it, wishing whoever it was to just leave already. There was a moment of silence and Luhan let out a sigh of relief as he thought the person had probably left.

Nope, he was wrong. The knocking became more persistent as it was getting louder at each thump. Luhan slowly stood up, trembling from the cold as his sense was getting together again. His body struggled to regulate his body temperature but failed miserably. Luhan inched closer to the door, not even bothering about looking at the peephole, before unlocking and tugging the door open. His eyes widened at the person standing at his front door.

 

 _"Little do you know_  
_I know you're hurting while I'm sound asleep_  
_Little do you know_  
_All my mistakes are slowly drowning me_  
_Little do you know_  
_I'm trying to make it better piece by piece"_

 

Warm arms wrapped around his small frame suddenly. Luhan stiffened slightly but gently melted into the other's embrace. **_Warm_**. Luhan missed this. The warmth engulfing him from the cold world. **_His scent_**. It eased him. He felt safe again and that was the only thing that mattered. He pressed his head against Yifan's chest and started sobbing loudly, new tears started to spill out as he repeatedly expressed his grieve of almost losing him. Yifan could only chuckle softly before pressing a gentle kiss on Luhan's forehead before proceeding to kiss his petite lover on the lips. The only thing that mattered now that his love came back to him again. Such a spoiled child he is. But they loved each other nevertheless. And they didn't mind starting from scratch, as long as they stood by each others' sides, **_love will find a way_**.

 

 _"Little do you know_  
_I, I love you 'til the sun dies"_

 

**Author's Note:**

> happy 3rd monthsary, love.


End file.
